The Healthy Side of Being A Slut

The following is an article written by Mrs. Lucky, a sexy Queen of Spades from the Northeastern United States who is a fan of the blog.  Leave comments and let her know how much you love the article.

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Last night I met a couple in their 80’s that seemed so playful and happy. Hoping I’d see them again I asked the lady where they live. “We sleep around,” she answered playfully. I leaned over and told my husband what I’d heard. He loved it, no surprise.

My husband and I met after both having failed marriages.  I thought my former husband and I were compatible. He adored me and we had great sex, at least for a while. When I told my mother this she quickly said to me, “Honey, sex is the easy part.”  She’s right you know. Marriage needs sex to rekindle the flame but it needs compatibility day to day more than anything else. For real compatibility to even be possible, we have to be true to ourselves as well as want to see our partner satisfied.

Honesty. That’s what got me to where I am today. A Hotwife, a swinger, mother of one, step-mother to more, owner of two businesses and happily married to a man I can say with certainty I will never leave.

You see, I think being a slut is healthy. It is the number one, single most empowering thing I have done in my life. And it keeps going. The more lovers and unusual situations we encounter, the more I learn and grow. As long as I am honest and committed to my man, there is personal growth and our intimacy as a couple deepens. Even the challenges this lifestyle has brought have caused quantum leaps in my growth as an individual.

It takes an unusual man to handle a sexually empowered woman. He has to know he gives her something she won’t find anywhere else. He can’t doubt her loyalty. The “home dick”, my husband reminds me, knows me better than anyone else. While he loves watching me with others, he knows that he personally brings me great pleasure. He has to love seeing his woman turn into that other woman, the animal one. The one who buys a new outfit with a lover in mind, the one who welcomes, invites and prepares herself for sex.

The premarital advice my husband received from his father was this-Find a woman who is a lady in public and a slut in the bedroom. My man says-If my wife wants to fuck a donkey, I’ll get the donkey. I guess he took it a bit further.

I didn’t do a donkey. I did, however, learn what I do like. (I swear that even blindfolded, I will find the one powerful black man in the room. But that’s a story for next time.) I woke up early sexually and thought I was fairly adventurous. In truth, my sexuality lived mostly underground. I gave sexually and didn’t know how to receive. I never asked for what I wanted and wondered why my partner didn't know how to please me. I dreamed up steamy scenarios and kept them to myself. I didn’t take responsibility for my own satisfaction.

The best part of this lifestyle is I keep learning and experiencing new things. “My body does what?!” Some women squirt, right? I never could and then… it happened. Oh, did I laugh! It was a fountain, a marvelous, out of control, “what the hell is happening to me?” fountain. Someone did something different. We all have the same anatomy. How silly of me to think I couldn’t experience things others can.

When sex is predictable, do we learn new things? If we only eat one kind of food, we miss out on experiencing new flavors, even new cultures.

My man says - Some people go bowling, but we do this. 

They say, the couple that plays together stays together. Play is a powerful thing. How do you keep your marriage alive and vibrant? How do you want to play?


  1. Fantastic perspective. "Some people go bowling" (love that). THIS is why interracial sex is thriving.

  2. Really good article and that body . . . . DAYUM!!!!

  3. This gal is a dream come true. Very sexy too.

    1. You make me smile with your comment. Thank you for that.

  4. This woman eyes say all of this in person. I have been the "Bullet Card " to this QUEEN. Everything she says here is true and it is Exponentially higher in person. Can't wait to see you Sunday!!

  5. Very true and well written, we totally agree. A and J

  6. The points of this article should be forwarded to marriage counselors. This gal nails it. We agree completely. We want more from her - and we want to see more of her. She's Lucky & He's Lucky.

  7. This is a very articulate and thought provoking piece. It goes beyond promoting the theme of the magazine and explores important issues in the sociology of marriage. The article advances the theme that monogamy detracts from marital success, an idea that underlies the "swinger" mentality in America. In essence, the idea is that sex is a form of recreation, and that couples should be free to explore, experiment, and engage in sexual adventures together, in ways that they have agreed will work for them. Our compliments to the author, both on the article and the successful marriage that it describes!

  8. IMHO this is the best write-up I've seen on the lifestyle and this couple is exceptional. They are both 'lucky". I also read Mrs. Lucky's QOS interview and it was great.

    As some interested in this lifestyle, but with a very conservative partner, I do have 3 questions for Mrs, Lucky.

    First, how did this topic come up between you and your husband? If you both met in the lifestyle I can see it, but otherwise how was it brought up? Were you both clearing dinner dishes one night and did Mrs. Lucky lean over the sink and say, "Gee honey, I've been thinking about having intimate relations with black men...would that be okay"?

    On more two more serious matter, given your family and business demands, how do you manage the logistics of this? If you have small children how do you get away? Do you invite gentleman over the house? Do you meet men alone? How does this actually work?

    Finally, how do you address the health risks? It sounds like you like bareback which is wonderful, but how do you protect yourselves? Do you screen first?

    I suppose I have one other question, how does your husband participate in your liaisons? Is he involved? Does he swing too or is his focus mostly on your enjoyment which it appears is his ultimate enjoyment too.

    I would love to hear more. The two of you have perhaps the healthiest attitude I have seen on this site and others in this community.

    Thank you.

    1. Love your questions! How did we get into this lifestyle? Look. Most couples aren't committed to growing together. Most people have affairs. That wasn't good enough for us. We've both been hurt by cheeting partners. We are committed to exploring life and evolving together. For example, after my man had a vasectomy, I started longing to be with a younger and presumably verily man. What was I going to do? Go off and cheat? No. I told him. I was honest and then we could figure out what to do with these feelings. By the way, he reversed his v so we could have a child.

    2. With our families and businesses we make special dates for play. Just like your kids play dates, just like your nights out, we schedule our play and that time is sacred. We might book a hotel out of town or plan a date when no one else is home.

  9. My man enjoys playing with other women as well as being involved in the sex while I'm with my lovers. He's cool being close to other guys but identifies as heterosexual. Most of our playmates are single males because it's often less complicated with men. The important thing is to stay honest as you stretch into new territory. The more you are open, the more there is to explore. You will discover things about yourself that you never imagined. My man is certainly not the cuckold in a chastity belt, but you never know. You just might enjoy that someday!